Emily, Editor & Sofia, Teacher

SUM-UP OF THE WEDDING VIBE: A community-focused weekend at summer camp, complete with a talent show, s’mores, popsicles, and a dance party heavy on ’90s R&B.

NUMBER OF GUESTS: 208
LOCATION: Hope Junction, New York

Where we allocated the most funds:

Definitely food and drinks for the reception and brunch the next morning. We knew we were going to have a big wedding, as we both have large families and a wide circle of friends. Because our wedding was two hundred–plus people and we are both huge fans of passed appetizers and open bars, our food costs were high. The camp also required that we use their in-house catering, so we couldn’t shop around for lower prices. However, we ended up loving every single dish the camp provided, from the barbecue salmon at dinner to the maple breakfast sausage and trays of avocado at brunch.

Where we allocated the least funds:

We didn’t pay much for lighting and flowers. Our lights were string lights ordered from Amazon, and our flowers were a hundred percent baby’s breath from Costco. We didn’t carry bouquets or give out corsages. Our family and friends nailed up the lights for us, and they helped us arrange twenty-five tables’ worth of flowers. We also got help spray-painting hundreds of glass bottles and jars to make our gold vases. Our napkins were part of Sofia’s great-grandmother’s dowry—some still had the family initials stitched into the corners. The family carried the napkins with them as they fled Nazi Europe. We dyed the napkins shibori-style using indigo dye, and guests got to take some of them home as favors.

We also didn’t pay anything for dessert since my mom made a total of six hundred mini-cupcakes for our reception—strawberry, lemon, and chocolate. They were not only beautiful, but delicious, and completely gone by the end of the after-party.

Finally, we did our own hair, with a little help from family and friends. We both have curly hair and are super particular about our curl preparation routines, so it was easiest to just use our own products and styling expertise. Our friend Chanel did our makeup as a gift.

What was totally worth it:

Our wedding was a full weekend long. We invited folks to stay in the on-site private cabins both Friday and Saturday night; guests paid for their rooms just like they would pay for a hotel. It took time to set up the website where guests could book rooms, and then to personally assign rooms to each party. Then it took more planning time to finalize the food, drinks, and entertainment for a full thirty-six hours. Sofia and I like to host and event-plan, though, so this wasn’t as arduous for us as it might have been for others. And once the wedding came, it was beyond worth the work it took to make it a weekend event.

On Friday night, we had a talent show where everyone—from my dad’s oldest friend to our youngest cousins—performed. No one will ever forget when one of our nieces, also named Sofia, rapped a near-flawless cover of Biz Markie’s “Just a Friend.” The camp opened up the lakefront on Saturday, and our family and friends lounged on pool floats and took out paddleboats before getting ready for the ceremony. Best of all, we actually got to spend quality time with our community before, during, and after the actual wedding—all we ever wanted.

What was totally NOT worth it:

We couldn’t really think of anything that wasn’t worth it. It’s true that we spent many hours making sure that small details were just right, but that was worth it for us. Some people might say that stressing about your wedding isn’t “worth it,” but as a person who deals with anxiety, advice like, “Don’t worry about it! Everything will be fine!” isn’t particularly helpful. I definitely did stress and worry about the wedding, but that was okay. Our wedding was a big deal to us, and we wanted it to be just right. I don’t regret taking it very seriously, because the emotional investment definitely paid off in the end.