If you’re anything like me, you love giving bridal shower gifts because, hello, it’s a (mostly) guilt-free excuse to go shopping for your best and beloved people. It’s especially fun when you damn conventions to all hell and start getting really creative with what kind of bridal shower gift a person about to get hitched and pledge their commitment to their person/lobster/constant for the rest of their lives could ever want/use/need.

Let’s be honest: According to the smart people at Vox, givers are selfish. What gifters actually yearn for is that  reaction they (hope to) get from giftees, and you know what? No apologies here. Bridal shower gifts should never be obligations. (I can repeat that if you didn’t hear: Gifts. Are. Not. Obligatory.) So, if you are indeed opting to get involved in the (potentially super fun, I promise!) bridal shower gift-giving custom, I’d hope you’re getting some enjoyment out of it, whether it’s from the feeling of contributing to your beloved friend’s dream honeymoon registry, finding a wedding night lingerie set that hits their style on the nose, or not having to worry about them slicing their hand open with those awful, awful, dull, cheap kitchen knives they haven’t gotten around to replacing.

For me, a rollicking fun bridal shower gift-giving time means hunting for items that are hopefully useful, easy on the senses, isn’t something they would necessarily think to buy (not that I don’t love a Whole Foods gift card when creative gift-giving block gets me down!), and has a special or unique twist. Bonus points if it’s a conduit to an experience (honeymoon trips! Setting up a new house with their partner! Cooking for their family! A future cocktail party! Having mindful, spiritual moments! That whole wedding thing!) or personalized (oh, say an address stamp for their new digs, a course on how to understand the goddess in their star chart, whiskey blended by you, or stationery sporting a custom illustrated portrait). Think of it as a challenge, a puzzle, or an indulgence to your egotistic “I give the best, most unusual, super-coolest gifts” side.

So yes, I’m a selfish gift-giver, but love me and you may just receive an illustrated Ruth Bader Ginsburg doll for your bridal shower gift. Or, you know, worst-case scenario, a Whole Foods Gift card.

Boozy bridal shower gifts

Agate Coasters via Amazon ($27.98)

W&P Design Moscow Mule Cocktail Syrup via Bloomingdale’s ($12)

The Gin + Tonic Carry-On Cocktail Kit via ManReady Mercantile ($24)

Bar-Backback via Picnic Time ($222.95)

Mateus Rose Wine from Portugal via Wine To Ship ($14.99)

Pineapple Ice Bucket via Bonjour Fete ($40)

Copper Rose Cocktail Glasses via Not on the High Street ($57.88)

Hochstadter’s Slow and Low Rock and Rye (made with rock candy!) via Wine Chateau ($26.97)

Pimp Your Fizz Kit for Prosecco via Etsy ($34.05)

Koloa Rym Bottled Cocktails via Shop Wine Direct ($14.99)

Custom Whiskey Blend via Whiskey Blender (around $100)

Lingerie Bridal Shower gifts

Twig Garter via Melinda Rose ($85)

Kopari Organic Coconut Melt and Massage Oil via Revolve ($38)